One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God.
"Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you created me and provided this
beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals
and that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not
happy."
"Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of
apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall
create a man for you."
"What's a man, Lord?"
"A man is a flawed creature, with many bad traits:
He'll lie, cheat, and be vain; all in all, he'll give
you a hard time. But he'll be bigger, faster, and
will like to hunt and kill things. He will look silly
when he's aroused, but since you've been complaining,
I'll create him in such a way that he will satisfy
your physical needs. He will be witless and will
revel in childish things like fighting and kicking a
ball about. He won't be too smart, so he'll also need
your advice to think properly."
"Sounds great." says Eve, with an ironically raised
eyebrow. But what's the catch, Lord?"
"Well ... you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"As I said, he'll be proud, arrogant, and
self-admiring ... So you'll have to let him believe
that I made him first. Just remember, it's our little
secret...... you know, woman to woman."